The Omega staff listened to student conversations in the hallway and selected ones that “best” described our student population.

Ω “If you insult my lunchbox one more time, I’m stealing one of your kidneys.”

Ω ”Do you think that I won’t have to take my math test if I get ebola before 6th period ?”

Ω ”Well if you aren’t going to ask your girlfriend to homecoming, can I?”

Ω “A homeless man peed on our window and now I have to clean it.”

Ω “I wish I could start my common app essay with, ‘first thing’s first I’m the realest.’ ”

Ω “I feel really bad for her because her whole life she has looked like the bunny from Arthur.”

Ω “I am like a sponge covered in wax; I’m not absorbing anything.”

Ω “I left my phone in my car and am thinking about ditching class to go get it.”

Ω “Dude, I have like one chest hair.”

Ω ”Omegle is the reason for my low self esteem.”

Ω “ I mean the subject is just kind of hard because you have to read the book from left to right.”