DGN athletes are greatly recognized as they defeat competition, break records and make history. However, less recognition is given to the parents of those athletes. Dedicated parents offer unconditional support and encouragement to help their athlete succeed, especially when things get tough.
“Being a parent of an athlete is being there to support them and not to critique. I was always one to advocate for finding all the good in their games,” mother Maureen Mulligan said. “At the end of the day, they’re there to love and be passionate about their sport.”
Mulligan is a mother of three, all of whom played sports at DGN and have since graduated. One of her kids, Maeve Mulligan, who graduated from DGN in 2017, tore her ACL, MCL, and meniscus twice on the same knee during her time at DGN playing soccer. The first tear happened her sophomore year, the second tear was during her junior year.
“It was devastating. It’s painful to watch your child not only be hurt physically, but emotionally too,” Mulligan said. “I think that is something that you don’t realize, is the emotional impact of an injury and the length of time it takes to recover.”
Unfortunately, injuries are not an unfamiliar part of being an athlete. A simple mis-step can lead to the most brutal consequences. Injuries can happen in as short as a few seconds, yet the time they take to heal has no limit.
“Both times were at least a nine month recovery with major surgery. Watching Maeve navigate the physical therapy and the actual surgery was really hard,” Mulligan said. “When you have to sit on the bench and take some time off, it’s difficult. As a parent, you have to be aware of those emotions and support them.”
Living with the constant hustle and bustle that comes with being on a team is something that families are forced to get used to. However, all of that can come to a screeching halt because of an injury. Leah Thulin, mother of five, has experience with this.
“Ethan broke both of his feet playing basketball and football,” Thulin said. “He ended up getting surgery for each one, he has screws in both of his feet.”
Ethan Thulin, who graduated from DGN in 2023, suffered from what is called a Jones fracture. It is a common break where the metatarsal bone in the foot is injured. They were both non-contact injuries and happened only a few months apart.
“Injuries will change an athlete’s whole day. They’re not able to do the things that they love or really work towards their goals,” Thulin said. “You have to support them in the adjustment of what those goals are going to look like; you can still accomplish those goals, but how are you going to adjust those goals and change your mindset? It doesn’t mean you’re not going to be able to achieve what you want to achieve, it just means that you need to adjust and do things a little bit differently.”
Injuries don’t just change how athletes play, they change how they think. The physical pain and limitation of an injury is visible to everyone, but what’s harder to see is the mental strain that comes with the recovery.
“The injuries are heartbreaking,” mother Meghan Crowley said. “You know they will be fine, but as a parent, you feel awful because you see how hard they work. To be sidelined crushes them, and it’s really hard to watch.”
Crowley is a mother of six, all of whom are involved in sports. Unfortunately, the Crowley family has had their share of injuries and is familiar with the topic.
“We’ve had a few broken fingers, a broken collar bone, two broken orbital bones, a hip stress fracture, and one torn meniscus,” Crowley said. “I try not to let it get the best of them. I remind them it’s temporary and encourage them to show up and be a great teammate from the bench.”
When competing gets hard and losses feel heavy, parents are there to offer hope and motivation. Each one has their own advice to recover from dealing with hardships. Chris Fanta is a father to three girls, and has developed a way to handle these things.
“Try to have your child see the other side of things. Having a positive attitude is very contagious,” Fanta said. “Sometimes they think the world is ending because they had a bad game, or tweaked their ankle, but that will pass. You will have a good game. Your injury will be healed.”
Learning to see situations from a different perspective is a general life lesson that can be useful in a lot of ways. It is common for an athlete to find themself learning things in their sport that apply to real life too.
“Sports have taught my kids so many lessons including how to have hard conversations with coaches, how to build camaraderie with teammates, how to handle stress, and how to turn the page after a bad game,” Crowley said.
These lessons may seem niche to the world of sports but really, are applicable to daily occurrences because of how general their underlying principles are.
“Athletics is a wonderful avenue to teach important life skills about the comebacks and how to react when something doesn’t go your way,” Thulin said. “We’re lucky our kids work hard and have abilities but it doesn’t matter to us whether they become college or varsity athletes or not. It’s about those lessons their coaches and teammates helped them work through.”
An athlete’s time as a competitor is an experience that will stick with them for life. Well-mannered and ethical behavior is typically encouraged in athletics to promote the concept of being a ‘good sport’.
“If they’re coming off a game and they’re upset, I tell my kids, ‘We’re gonna be upset about a loss or a bad game and that’s ok, feel it for a moment, but we’re not going to hang on to it. It’s not worth it,’” Mulligan said.
Parents have an innate influence on their children. The behaviors and attitudes they carry themselves, are bound to rub off on their children. How parents choose to react to different situations around their children is important.
“I just try to be very positive with my girls. One time Ady was playing with the top talent in the area so she didn’t get as much playing time as she maybe wanted,” Fanta said. “Some college coaches that had seen Ady in other games said ‘You didn’t play as much that game, but you kept a smile on your face and you were positive with your teammates and we love that about you. We’re gonna offer you.’”
A philosophy of Fantas’ when it comes to parenting an athlete revolves around the concept of being present. He believes one of the most significant things you can do for your child is to simply show up.
“If you can make it, go to the game. My daughters know that they can look in the stands and know, most likely, that I’ll be there. If you can’t make it to the game, be supportive at home by asking how it went,” Fanta said. “They’ll know you support them and care about what they’re doing.”
Competing is about so much more than just winning and losing. It’s about becoming a better person than you were when you started.
“I don’t think success is in your stats. I think success comes from being a great teammate, a leader, being reliable, coachable, and respectful,” Crowley said. “Those are the things that people will remember about you.”
The lessons and experiences gathered as an athlete are so important– they are the ultimate take away.
“Whether they win or lose, enjoy the moment because, after these four years, most kids don’t go on to play at the next level. As a parent, this is kind of your last hurrah to be your kids biggest cheerleader,” Mulligan said.
