The Omega staff listened to student conversations in the hallway and selected ones that “best” described our student population.
Ω “Derrick Rose wasn’t even important until he hurt his knee again.”
Ω “I went to the nurse because I stapled my thumb. It’s a sharp sting, but it doesn’t hurt that much.”
Ω “It’s not like the ACT means anything anyway.”
Ω “I think I’m going to end up selling my organs on the black market so I can pay for my prom dress.”
Ω “If I had to give up all my fingers except one, I think I would keep the middle finger so I can still talk to people.”
Ω ”I want to be one of those people that fixes dogs.”
Ω “You don’t have much personality when you’re an arsonist, but at least you literally light up the room.”
Ω ”I was supposed to ration my pack of thin mints throughout the whole day, but they only made it through one period.”
Ω “I’d rather listen to Ariana Grande on repeat forever than take the PARCC test.”
Ω “You’re just as irrelevant as Blockbuster.”
Ω ”I had to hold hands with the nose picker!”
Ω “April is just an unneeded month. I think we should just go from March to May.”
Ω “Dude, do you think that the Green Power Ranger is organic?”
Ω “Seriously if I saw my eighth grade self today, I’d punch him in the face.”
Ω “Guys, look! I shaved my arms. I know you’re not supposed to do that, but I did anyway.”
Ω “I mean, just because she is a freshman doesn’t mean she isn’t hot.”
Ω “I literally just don’t understand math. Literally.”
Ω “He hates me. I should just tell him I’m pregnant.”
Ω “For Lent I’m just giving up everything.”